Flourishing in Every Way

We only talk about the burdens or reasons why people don’t want to marry a pastor—often and sadly categorized as an immediate red flag.

Well, I’m here today to help shift that narrative and share one perk of being a pastor’s wife.

It is on-demand pastoral counsel.

For the average church member, receiving pastoral counsel usually looks something like this:

• First, you wonder if you should even reach out—knowing how busy your pastor is
• Then, you take the time to write and send a message
• When they’re able to respond, you work together to find a time to meet or talk
• If you’re lucky, you might catch them for a quick call

From the moment you realize you need counsel to the moment you actually receive it, it can take anywhere from one day to a week (hopefully not longer).

But for me, this is what it looks like.

It’s 12:30AM. We’re in the bathroom, brushing our teeth, casually catching up on the day. I share something that’s been sitting on my mind all day, unplanned but just a natural thing to share because our conversation is flowing. And unexpectedly, my husband speaks with such kindness and wisdom and brings reconciliation to my brewing thoughts. Counsel I didn’t even know I needed until it happened. It was so natural, gentle, and so him.

I didn’t need to spend time scheduling, waiting, or wondering if he is available.

It was just an ordinary day, filled with ordinary conversation, met with counsel—on demand (in fact, I wasn’t even looking for it—I just got it).

We live in a world where everything is instant and quickly accessible—literally just a few clicks away. And in a quiet, unexpected way, this is one of the instant perks I get to experience.

Google wasn’t my counselor, and ChatGPT wasn’t either. Not to mention, Reddit.

It was my husband—a real person, my residential partner, and my forever teammate—speaking truth into my life in real-time.

This is everyday living for me—a gift I don’t take for granted.